What does this mean you might ask?? ….
It is late at night and I can’t sleep so what do I do? I watch tutorials on photography to get better, I read wedding blogs to learn what is up and coming, and I check in on fellow friendors. What is a friendor?? Well we fellow wedding/party vendors call each other friendors to suggest we are all friends, but in reality we are not. Some may call this blog controversial but I call it real!!!!!
I was in the process on wanting to create my own wedding preferred vendor list “friendors” and after looking at some other websites I decided not to. I am torn because especially as a planner I feel like I should offer up a list of people I have worked with, but there are other amazing people in town I haven’t worked with. Should these people be excluded even though they are fantastic at their job? Do I think my preferred list rocks, have I seen tons of their work, is their space beautiful, do they have great food, good service? Yes to all , but does that justify me giving them first preference over TONS of other amazing “friendors” in town? No!
1. You the client are not me
2. Your personalities may clash
3. Maybe they are amazing but out of your budget
4. Perhaps your “friendor” is someone I have never worked with
I will tell you from the vendors side I don’t want to feel “unworthy” to not be included on a vendors site but sometimes because we are all human it hurts our feelings. It’s like the kid who got picked last in gym class. Then my reality check is that I am not “included” not because I don’t deserve it but because there is a click or a monopoly. One which I am not included in. Fellow “friendors” excluding me from their list whether they know if my work is amazing or bad! Your lose! I have decided I won’t create a list as I don’t want myself or my clients to miss a good thing with any vendor in town. There are so many AMAZING VENDORS to choose from and enough work for us all. Good luck friendors 🙂
Please do not misunderstand me and think that I am saying all preferred lists are not worthy. Many of those vendors do an AMAZING job and deserve a call for a quote. Many vendors do a great job of not only fulfilling their contractual obligation but also making sure you walk away 100% satisfied. Some vendors work hard for each and every client because they are passionate about their company, reputation, and business. These are teh vendors you should hire! Follow your gut and go with who you trust no matter where the recommendation comes from. Hire the vendor that you feel will give you the best quality service not cheapest price.
I write this blog both out of personal frustration sometimes that comes from being on the short side of the stick with some vendors/venues and also to warn future clients. Whether you hire me or not isn’t the issue at hand but ask HOW your planner/venue/photographer/caterer/etc came up with this vendor list. Some will tell you it is whom has worked in the space which makes sense, but some just say because they are good. Ask yourself if a company has been in business for roughly over 2 years or more their “friendor” list would not fit on one page. The reality here is to do your own research, remember to ask questions, and lastly ask for personaly references from past clients for any vendor or venue.
I kind of have mixed feelings about vendor/friendor lists. Yes, sometimes planners/venues/other vendors go above and beyond and I am definitely likely to recommend them because they are a pleasure to work with. However, there are a LOT of vendor lists that are clique based or worse, are PAID lists! Nothing wrong with paid advertising, but it should be disclosed as such, not disguised. I definitely agree that any bride looking at a preferred vendor list would do well to ask about how the list was generated. They are a good place to start your search as a bride, but definitely consider others outside of the list as well!
I agree.. this list should be told that it’s paid for if it is. 🙂 Thank you for reading and commenting. I truly appreciate you taking your time to stop by my blog.